Things around here are about to get really crazy. And by crazy I mean your feed reader may actually get notifications that I've updated this blog more than once every four months. It's no secret to those who know me that I've been lost for quite some time. I attribute that to some seriously challenging health issues that I've been living with for the last seven years but it's definitely not the only reason I have been lost. In some ways, I'm not sure I ever really knew who I was to begin with. A lot of my life has been spent living up to what I think people expect from me and being ashamed of or embarrassed by my own passions and interests. A loss of confidence and a distorted sense of self. Or because of the perfectionist in me, the self disappointment in the things I have pursued (or halfheartedly pursued out of fear of failing) has been so intense that I just live in a sea of self-doubt, letting these pursuits fall by the wayside without truly giving them a valiant effort. As a result, the essence of who I am has been buried so deeply that unearthing it comes as no easy task.
So that is what I want to do here. Unearth. Dig. Uncover. Make new. Forge beauty from weariness and loss. Give a voice to the voiceless. And when I closed my old blog and started this new one over a year ago, I knew there was something serendipitous about the idea of flourishing but I truly didn't know what it looked like or how it would play out. It was a wish. A word that came to me in the middle of the night as something that I wanted for my own life, even though I didn't really have a concrete idea of how to make that happen. But I don't want this just for myself. I want to take my life, my experiences, my joys, my struggles, my pain, my loss, my success, my creativity - my essence - and share them in such a way that they allow others to flourish. I want this to be bigger than myself. Of course I want to to be well and I want to be thriving but I want it to mean something. I don't have a road map for how this adventure will unfold. I have a few ideas and things I'd like to make happen in this space but I don't feel like rushing it is a good idea. I want things to unfold organically. And for right now, I just feel like I'm supposed to write.
So there may not be as many photos around here. And then again, there may be. Maybe writing will unlock a certain part of my creative soul that will give me more creative energy and confidence. And then again, maybe it's just about writing. Maybe there will be a give and take. A little writing, a few more photos. I don't exactly know. Regardless, I'm honored that YOU are reading along and am bubbling with excitement at the prospect of what is to come.